Schizmu …Toronto and some insanity.

So Madonna is going to be turning fifty this summer and she definitely makes for a fabulous looking fifty; I don’t think anyone can doubt that. A case of natural “good genes” or a board certified physician? Who knows, but at this point in the plastic land of Hollywood, it really doesn’t matter.

“Madge” is a symbol of everything pop culture, the quintessential pop star. She has been a media darling since before I’ve been born and yet while many of her 80’s contemporaries musical careers have been relegated to what can be found in the Wal-Mart discount rack, she is still churning out top ten hits.

Most of her success can be explained by good ol’ media savvy. With disturbing regularity she is able to analyze the current market trends of music and capitalize on them.

Currently she has her trend radar focused on the duo of Timbaland and Justin Timberlake, who have both made grabs on the pop charts collaborating with just about everybody. The resulting single “4 Minutes” is slick and polished with more than enough catchy hooks, distinctly “Timbaland”, the lyrics don’t make a lick of sense, but it’s exactly what is being played on the radio these days. Another top ten hit.

So where does the creepy assertion come in? Well, she’s fifty, and she’s still acting and dressing very sexually. She could, quite easily, be somebody’s grandmother. It’s a little bit of a shiver factor, even if she still is incredibly attractive.

Now I don’t want to feed into the Hollywood double standard either, where Harrison Ford is considered just as sexy today as he was thirty-one years ago playing Han Solo in Star Wars while wanting Diane Keaton to look exactly the way she did thirty-one years ago in Annie Hall. You can be sexy at pretty much any age, if Harrison and Diane want a three-way you can give them my number. At some point however, you do need to work on making the transition from ’sexy’ to ’sophisticated’, lest you become more plastic than human, a la Cher.

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